“This is the new age, we live in a gender less society” 

 Mad Max : Max Fury is great on so many levels, one of them is because it’s all about female power without male bashing. Another reason is that it’s set in a dystopia, so naturally it employs an amazing narrative. The narrative never gets boring, even though it makes you feel thirsty for water (not the thirst for sex) because everything that happens in the movie is in a desert because the "world is already dead" and there’s this villain called Immortan Joe, I call him a villain because from the moment you see him, you know that he’s the bad guy. So, Immortan Joe gives rations of water to his followers by a drop and then proceeds to tell them “not to get addicted to water”, the audacity reminds me of a lot of people in contemporary politics. Amongst all the dust stormed filled, diesel powered car chasing scenes, of course there wouldn’t be any Max Fury without Furiosa but Max himself turns the narrative. The thing about Furiosa is that Charlize Theoron plays her with so much conviction, she can nail this character as one of the nominees of The Best Female Hero Hall of Fame and of course Tom Hardy plays Max with enough emotions and a lick of English accented voice. 

There are lots of back stories that do not get answered like, why does Max see flashbacks? And how can Furiosa sense his “vision”, these are questions that will be answered in the next installment hopefully. One thing that really strikes out in the movie is that it’s not boring at all, that THAT’s saying a lot!!! There are plots and subplots but one thing that could not be found in the movie is a “washed down” narrative. For me, the powered chord churning dude was an eye opener, especially considering the fact that he has his own vehicle which transports him to battle zones while he turns out power chords for his fellow soldiers, there’s a place for everyone in the army and the best thing is; his guitar also serves as a flame thrower!

All George Miller movies like Happy Feet to me are always filled with a “family” sort of a feeling and Mad Max is exactly that too. When you look at it from a director’s brilliance it’s brilliant, if you look at it from a “female power” point of view, it’s super too or if you’re an action junkie, it will quench that. The movie proudly boasts $150 million budget and a lot of directors do not know what do with that much amount of money but George Miller takes his brilliance and serves a lot of tastes, like the so called “one shade suits all” miracle face powder that my mom lauds. Go see it in the theatre like it’s meant to.

Caleb's Guide : What To Watch and Listen

On this update, I'm gonna tell you what you should listen to or watch. You see, content is always very important to me and unless I can hook you up to some new and fresh sort of entertainment, I don't talk about it, that is the code for I don't make updates unless the content means something to you the readers. So, you might not see a post about googled magazine covers ever day on this blog but be rest assured that if I make an update, it'll have an actual content. My critiques are always on the 'academic style' side of things. So, anyway, here's what you need to have on your playlist in early 2015.

MUSIC: 

Rihanna releases a new single 

Rihanna, Kanye West and wait for it.... Paul McCartney just released a song called "Four Five Seconds"!!!!! "FourFiveSeconds" as per the listing on iTunes. I can't buy it yet on iTunes Store India because "It's not available in your location". JustJared.com uploaded a full length version of the song and it sounds catchy but not in a catchy way that we're all used to. It does not employ the EDM sound, not only does it not have EDM or Trap inspired arrangement, the single only has strings as an instrument(s), back vocals and of course Kanye -not sure if they used 1 or more guitars- . The song focuses on Rihanna's vocals which she gives in a "Diamonds" style punch. It's been 2 years since Rihanna released a full length studio album and that's a long time for her 'cause she's known as the girl who releases a new album ever November.  There's always this "out of our minds" reaction to the first single from any Rihanna's album and I'm sure this single will hit the top spot again but who the fuck knows? I like it, it sounds radio friendly too.

"Life's too short to pretend not to like a catchy Taylor Swift song"

Technically, 1989 isn't a new release, it was released last year! But Taylor's vision when she recorded this highly successful album can be felt throughout. She already has 2 No.1 singles from 1989 but it looks like she'll score even more. My favorite track is "I Know Places" I even did a cover on my Soundcloud. So, here's why you should listen to this album; Taylor Swift is a very good song writer! Your brain might repel her (trust me, mine did) but when you let the music speak for itself, it's actually very good! She's no longer writing lyrics about "you're wrong and this is how it made me feel"rather lines than hints to her cheating on her boyfriends too in the past, like in the track called Style "I said I've been there a few times". 

The thing about Taylor Swift is that she's tasteful, 1989 sold so much! and she does not need to hump a sofa to sell albums, not that artists who do that are bad or anything but she "stands out" is what I meant. The only problem that I have with 1989 is that at some moments Taylor seems to be holding back, see her Bonus tracks have 2 of the most gratifying and fresh songs. Guess, that all sums up in  "board room meetings"

Madonna's Back! Sort of...

Madonna is set to release her 375th album, Rebel Heart! I lost track of how many albums she has released over her 145 years of career in entertainment. We've all heard of her "leaked" demos, which has become a syntax for a new Madonna album. But in all seriousness, this is what bothers me; Madonna who rarely does anything without being paid only creates buzz from leaked demos these days! Of course she has been teasing fans with her Instagram posts, spams rather about a possible new album but it all seems so calculated and out of place. 

Don't get me wrong, there is no such thing as bad press in publicity and if I hate her I would not even talk about her!. Rebel Heart is expected to be released on March 2015 so that means the full album is not available yet but if you pre-order it on iTunes you'll get the pre-order tracks. Can Madonna's music speak for itself anymore? I guess not, her singles will obviously continue to flop like first single "Living For Love" already does but it's worth a listen because the songs are pretty OK, like for instance "Devil Pray" which is not radio friendly in any way but super catchy, American radios don't support Madonna as much as they should anymore after she publicly blasted then president George W. Bush, besides you'll be hearing all about the antics and gimmicks that she'll pull at her appearances and the calculated publicity stunt riddled inevitable world tour. 

TV:

Homeland

Brody's dead in the last season and Carrie still manages to make the show thrilling. This proves the fact that shows or entertainment of any kind with women on the lead can be crazy popular and also earn a lot of money. This season is set in Pakistan a lot. Turns out Pakistan has a lot of "modern" areas, I'm already aware of this but to see it on one of your favorite TV shows is not as compelling to say the least. Carrie a C.I.A. cheif of staff who is played by Clair Daines is still very troubled, hot headed and smart. She still continues to manipulate people's weakness and use them for her own/mission benefit (USA's benefit as she puts it). 

A lot of people call this show anti-Islam and I can see why, quotes like, "Pakistan? It's not even a real country, it's a fucking synonym" might not do any good for people who are on "Homeland is Islamaphonic" side but there's a quote in one of the episodes, "You point your fingers on Islam but if you look a Christianity and how many sufferings it has caused in this world, who would want to be a Christian?". I guess it's important to know at the end of the day that these are just entertainment, it's a TV show and things like major plot twists every episode, A+ acting and well produced direction make Homeland a damn fine TV Show. 

Podcast:

SERIAL

I can't even start on how good this podcast is. OK, at first, I subscribed to it 'cause it was on the iTunes most popular list for a while and dove straight into it. It wasn't until the third episode that I realized "It's about an actual real life event!". So, here's what it's all about; a high school student in Baltimore, Hye Min Lee went missing on 13th February 1999, her body was found almost a month later; her ex boyfriend Adnan Syed is then convicted of the murder and spends his days in a maximum security prison since 2000 but Adnan continues to say that he's innocent. And here's why you need to listen to it: The podcast takes you to the journey of "is he innocent?" or "Is he not?" in a TV style narrative which is just so addictive. Host Sarah Khoelin talks about the jury's decision and how there is no physical evidence against Adnan, she even goes on to say, "Sometimes I'm convinced that he's innocent and sometimes I wonder if I'm being played because when I talk to him, he's smart, funny and charming which sociopaths usually are" 

As per my opinion on if Adnan Syed is guilty or not, I don't know man, I mean, I just.. I mean I can't say, who knows what went down on that day, you know what I'm saying, I mean, I don't know. (If you do not get this joke, listen to the podcast NOW!)

Psycho Babble

If you're on the YouTube-osphere you'll probably know who Tyler Oakley is. So, yeah, he and best friend Korey Kuhl branch out to podcasting like fellow YouTuber Shane Dawson, This podcast is funny, insightful, silly and not too long at about 30 minutes each episode. It's pretty much pop culture and like Tyler puts it, "It's not just crazy talk, it's Psycho Babble"

TINASHE - AQUARIUS : Music Review

We lost Aaliyah, may she rest in peace. I want to talk about Aaliyah first before I dive into Tinashe mainly because Aaliyah was such an immense talent. Her style of advertising herself was not too tacky but classy and sexy, she made classic sexy commercial. Her commercial did not end with her looks, she sang so well and Tinashe reminds me of Aaliyah in all the good ways!

Yes, Tinashe comes off as a bit "slutty" especially if you watch her interviews on YouTube. But it's all worth it when you listen to her debut album!!! Her R&B style vocal is bringing it! Her well calculated image does not come off as a gimmick at all. She has a lot of production work done under her belt, at a home studio where she produced her then promising mix tapes. However, Aquarius is a full length album distributed by RCA, as commercial and mainstream as it can get. A lot of questions come naturally, will it sell? Will it match the success of her US Top 40 single "2 ON"?

The most important question to me is "Does it deliver?". Yes and No. YES because of her spot on vocals and flirtatious, femme fetale, "you don't know shit about me" delivery. Also, the fact that her presence is strongly felt even when collaborating with big time producers like A$AP Rocky and Mike Will Made It, courtesy the project budget from RCA. There are not much misses but NO delivery happens for the lack of radio friendly tracks. Radio friendly sound is one of the ingredients of a No.1 single right? but anything can happen in this industry . So, in other words, Tinashe's Aquarius does not deliver in a way that there is no "Dr.Luke", "Take my to the chorus", radio friendly single.

Aquarius does have quality though, winking at the audience, flirting at you. Tinashe's career is promising to say the least!!! This '93 born R&B singer is selling it! Yaaaasss!!!!

Buy it on iTunes:

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/aquarius/id911472229

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles : Movie Review

Teenage mutant ninja turtles, yes, it’s a huge pop culture show for all of us. But did it settle with the audience of the silver screen this time around? The answer to that is both yes and no. I like the C.G.I, it does not get better than that, Hollywood production at its best. What flawed TMNT is the silly plot. If I wanna watch something as cheesy as this, I’d rather watch a Karan Johar movie!

Yes, it’s true, I love Megan Fox! She’s so pretty! She’s so hot! Sex, sex , sex!. She acted kind of OK. The scene where in the ninja turtles and her glide down a snow covered mountain side is the most chilling, she screamed at the right place, laughed at the right place while our favorite ninjas go around looking like monsters, a production decision I find really hard to understand.

It’s a Paramount production so naturally come the MTV plug, of course! I was in shocked and awe when Hollaback Girl was played and this is where the plot gets confusing, how old are the Mutant Ninjas? Or was Viacom just trying to slightly hint that Gwen Stefani is back? Viacom is too huge of a company to pin point manage Gwen’s promotion but were they? Yes, the plot is indeed diabolical! 

Maleficent : Movie Review

There is something about Angelina Jolie that I will always love. She's drop dead beautiful with or without make up. She acts so well (with or without sex scenes) She's the home wrecker who refused to be hated. She's the actress who went to Pakistan and traveled on a bus! Yes, you get the picture, ANGELINA JOLIE IS AWESOME. So, naturally, Maleficent is a movie that is made better with the help of Angelina Jolie!

Maleficent is a remake of Disney's Sleeping Beauty told in the light of Disney's most compelling villain. Every graphic in the movie is beautiful, even the CGI is so detailed that it looks like the depth and detail texture of a physical set. But yes, like all CGIs, some of it feels like a CGI. The movie goes on to tell the story of a young Maleficent who's a fairy, who lives in the Moors, a land set off from humans because apparently humans are evil. She fell in love with a human who later drugs and physically abused her by cutting off her wings. Here comes Jolie's impeccable performance; she wakes up in a forests to find out that her wings were cut off by her human lover then she gave out a chilling sob nearly deviating from a Disney friendly plot. Angie, you're good!

So, the plot goes on to show the many evils of human beings but mainly the sin of greed. Maleficent cursed young Arora, the daughter of her ex lover who became king for reasons I wont tell because I don't want to be sued. Maleficent cursed Arora to fall into a sleep like trance on her 16th birthday. She's so keen on keeping this curse alive that she ends up saving young Arora from death. And then the feminist plots came into life. 

Angie's performance sells Maleficent, the plot is bruised by deviating to many sub plots. Disney lately becomes very good in terms of "moral". There's no more of the brain smashing cheese anymore and I like the ride very much. Frozen is another example of the "new age Disney". Well, any movie has my approval as long as it has Angelina Jolie in it. 

Godzilla : Movie Review

Hollywood reboots change so many things. Godzilla and Spiderman are the main example. So, I am at the movies thinking Godzilla is gonna be the bad guy but turns out it’s totally different. Direction wise, this movie is very polite, or shy rather because there is no “in your face” action. It works ‘cause the lesser the villan scruffs on your face, the scarier it gets.

Set in Japan at the beginning, Bryan Cranston proves yet again that he can act complex characters, depressed rather. The plot is not very easy to keep up with. It’s confusing at times because of the many mentions of “radiology” and other scientific shit like that. I was not interested at all about the damn science shit but it’s all about making the audience a little confused to keep them on the edge of their seats right?

I said that Godzilla is the summer blockbuster that I look most forward to, (in 2013 it was Man Of Steel) and I should tell you, it’s not as orgasmic as Man Of Steel but not at all a let down like “Now You See Me” which was a total bluff. I like Godzilla because yes, the acting is very good, the young Olsen sister acts all her character’s emotions way too much but it works, also the characters are complex and realateable. Gareth Edwards directs the movie at ground level where in the audience feel as though we’re in the actual movie staring at Godzilla from the window of a school bus. Everything is so Hollywood like the scene where a dog barks at an oncoming tsunami leading to a flood that engulfs the whole city, the dog died? Oh no! It ran away to safety and was it shown again? No.

I’m not even gonna start with the 3D effect because every movie with a 3D tag lately for me means “less brightness, 3D at the beginning but bland all the way through” I’m yet to see an unanimated 3D movie that actually HAS 3D effects post the Avatar 3D hysteria. So, in conclusion, Godzilla is not a boring movie at all. I like it a lot. It’s just that I should not set my expectations too high the next time. 

Why Madonna Should Retire

Madonna started her career even before I was born. She’s the original slut of pop; call it female empowerment or anything you want but her ever changing persona is always sex. She is the epitome of sex sells, she helps shape music by pushing what is acceptable and all that but that was way long ago! What is she now? An artist who’s singles doesn’t sell anymore, an artist who cannot sing a single line in tune at a live setting and most prominently, she’s a publicity stunt gimmick, in other words, an attention whore. 

I would say that she’s an icon, no doubt about it. She’s huge, everybody in the world knows her, even my late grand mama admitted that amongst all the pop stars, she knows Madonna and Michael Jackson, that’s how famous she is. But like all good things, it must come to an end. I say this because someone needs to say it, “Madonna needs to retire now”. Nobody asked for a lack luster single and certainly not a shade to Lady Gaga who is the new talent.

Madonna might claim that she likes Lady Gaga but in all seriousness, it does not seem like it’s so. She mocked Lady Gaga at her sold out world tour at the same time contradicting herself by saying that she likes Gaga there by leaving a wide gap for 40 plus year old gay men to interpret it is as “sarcasm”, that’s why most older gays hate Lady Gaga so much. Professional writers, critics and other artist alike have been throwing shade towards Madonna since timely memorial, yes she has had a lot of harsh criticisms in her career. But this so called fit between Lady Gaga and Madonna is a thing that the press obviously fuels apart from the fans that spread it like wildfire. So you might ask? Does it benefit both the sluts of pop because it creates a competition thereby prompting fans to buy more singles out of competition or more mentions at the press? Yes but isn’t this tactic way too boring? Lady Gaga is also boring too, she is out of ideas now even though she’s stupendously talented. However, Madonna is way more boring and way out of ideas that her idea fountain is a frickle of dust now and Lady Gaga’s  is still flowing in a stream. 

So this leads me to ask. When your star does not shine anymore is it acceptable to still try to be relevant? Is it high time to note that you’re done when you can’t sing live anymore, not even a single line in tune? Is it female empowerment to cling on to your youth when you have flabs on your arms and have to wear gloves to hide your sagging hands? I believe in the fact the growing old is an opportunity and it should be done gracefully rather than the way Madonna is handling it or rather avoiding it. Is it ok to spur up drama and hate towards young talents just to stay relevant? When your tour does not even involve you dancing but just dry humping the air while your dancers do all the hard work is still innovative? When you‘re just “so out of ideas” why would you still release new materials? 

Madonna needs to retire, we know that and it’s a shame because for a person as famous and as talented as her, she would obviously be smart enough to smell the rotten  but truth is, she chose to ignore it maybe because she wants more money? I don’t think so since she’s loaded. Note Guy Ritchie got a lot of her money after their sad divorce but still almost 3 decades of mega stardom would certainly pay. Here’s the thing, we loved Madonna back in the days but the curtain has already been called, she’s back for an encore and she refuses to leave the stage even after the 2nd curtain call.